The Cri De Coeur Of Life....Or Not! - Part 4

As you may remember that Part 3 had a nail-biter of a question to end for a smashing finish in this blog,

V: How can u be so sure that u only live once? Just because Science hasn't proved rebirth, it doesn't mean that rebirth doesn't exist..It may or it may not...Once upon a time, Pluto was a planet...now, it's not...IMHO, Science is all about addition, subtraction, multiplication and division of the objective reality based on extensive and exhaustive observations and recordings with the available technology at hand..Who knows..someday in the future, some one can prove that one of the greatest mind Einstein's theory is wrong...This being the case, to outrightly dismiss that there is no such thing as rebirth is pure stupidity..even if eminent scientists say that rebirth is bullshit, they are going against the fundamental principles of science itself - to be open minded and question the nature of reality..just because they can't prove it as of now, it doesn't mean rebirth doesn't exist...kindly don't say that science hasn't proved the existence of unicorns and dragons and Godzillas, so does it mean they are alive....

 I am still saying that I am not against the demonstration of acts of love through material objects...I have given my observation at length for Ur First comment...all I concluded was that love shouldn't be solely dependent on the value of material objects but it should actually be between the 2 souls for a truly happy life..I will extend it further..A gives a really priceless gift to B for every bday..but, when B falls sick, A just writes a cheque or swipes a card and spends money on them in a top quality hospital with best facilities without actually being in person to take care of them..24*7 with B is not practically possible as A also has work to do...But, if A doesnt even visit B in the hospital to see how they are recovering, is it love?

S: First of all there is no rebirth. We are all basically machines run by bio energy. Our fuel is food. After a point of time there is no way a machine can be refurbished and can only be condemned. Science cannot prove rebirth as there is nothing of that sort. When A doesn't take care of B when B is sick then it isn't love. A cannot be there 24x7 but B will understand that if B loves A. But what is wrong in expressing love by materialism if it gives a short lived happiness. Love is an emotion and a feeling that cannot be described. It must be felt and given back to enjoy it.

If you express love only when A or B is sick and other times just be passive and detached then I don't see a point of enjoying and feeling love.

Whatever i see nothing wrong in expressing love via materialism. But it can only be a way of expression but love is something that comes automatically not subject to materialistic possession

V: .Human Beings? Machines? Seriously?? Machines aren't sentient beings capable of loving or feeling or giving birth to children..at least the today's AI is in a nascent stage that hasn't become so advanced now..As u have a strong belief and considering that human beings are nothing more than only machines, there's no use in speaking on rebirth anymore.I will just say one thing..300yrs ago, had anyone said that we are surrounded by invisible radiation like Microwaves, ppl would have laughed and ridiculed those who had put forth this thought.

How am I able to say it with such categorical certainty? History hasn't spared (read: Brutal and Heartless) ppl like Bruno or Galileo when they propounded the Helio-Centric Theory..Just imagine what would have happened to anyone who had said that invisible rays are swirling around us..I am actually horrified to even imagine the plight if such an instance happened..In the end, everyone knows that the Earth revolves around the sun despite the strong (Read: Strong and wrong) belief that the sun revolved around the earth which prevailed at that point in time...Oh...By the way, Microwaves also exist as many of us use it to cook, or grill or reheat tasty food...

."Short-lived happiness" is a dicey terminology. 80 yrs? 50 yrs? 5 yrs? 5 mins? 2 secs? What is short-lived happiness? My small brain isn't able to understand what u r trying to say here, machi.. :( :'( 

Deiiiii.....that's what I am also saying it from the beginning....If material possessions are used as ways of expression, then it's fine..But, big problem arises when ppl perceive and equate the material possessions as love itself...Even if u r not in love or loaded with infatuation, a person can still lavish the other person with fancy gifts...U can possibly say that I am preaching or giving lip service...Unless an individual has internalized the observations and learning from experiences, they will be unable to articulate anything with precision and simplify things else the ppl will just parrot from wherever they have read or seen or listened or make an oral observation like "Sun is shining"...

With this, the denouement of the discussion between us was up in the air.

But, I will bring to its right logical conclusion as to how Love ought to be so that it creates an endearing, super-strong and ever-lasting connection between the two souls involved.

For any couple to live happily ever after like in Disney Movies, 

the two persons should necessarily have the same core values as children upbringing, money-saving & spending, right & wrong but varied interests like movies, music, drama etc.

The reason why I said common moral principles should exist is that it is then the relationship has a solid foundation between them and similarity of values is essentially important to have sustained bond in the long run. 

Dissimilarity in tastes and preferences like songs, dance, books etc. can help each other to widen and broaden their depth in better understanding and appreciation of each other. Also, it gives both an opportunity to tease, poke jokes, make fun and learn new things. 

Variety is the spice of life, right?   

Generalizing on a global level, when we are able to rejoice the parity and celebrate the disparity, then the world becomes a blessed place and a heaven for every person on the Planet to not only survive and live but also thrive and blossom to their fullest potentials. 

However, if the similarity is there in secondary attributes like movies and dissimilarity in the primary attribute as the foundational structure, then things will be all smiles in the initial stages but thunderstorms with bright lightning are sure to threaten the very existence of the relationship. 

Such a case is definite to rock the boat and in the worst-case scenario flounder it as well unless the couple has the deep inclination to be with each other.

Better to be single or wait till you meet the right person than be in a r'ship filled with doubts, suspicions, daily fights and constant ugly altercations that makes life miserable for both the ppl once the early intense love based on secondary attributes, money, wealth, intelligence, beauty, affluence, social status and connections fizzles out that are based on pre-determined conditions and fixed checklists. 

Long-term and rock-solid committed r'ship that will easily last 80 to 100yrs built on unconditional love will survive any storm because the people in the r'ship are the top-priority and not their petty, inflated egos.

Of course, fights will be there in it as well. 

But, it wouldn't be blown out of proportion and be well-within control as the primary focus of such a love is to sustain the r'ship and not to look for ways to end it.

Whatever I have said above regarding the similarity in core values and dissimilarity in choices and the subsequent points, I don't have any empirical statistics to back me as the learning is based solely on my personal experiences.

And, this is my definition and prescription of True Love as well for a happy and joyous life.

                                                          X---Concluded---X

PS 1:
If you may have a doubt as to how Part 1 has a connection with the other parts which principally deals with love, lust, and infatuation, it's due to the fact that love is an experience that must be savored and relished to the very last bit even in the horrible-of-the-terrible scenario that it ends up in a heart-wrenching heartache due to vicissitudes of fate as separation or death.

PS 2: 
Now, you know why I began this wheel of a series with experience and have ended up by citing experience and completing a circularly logical link for every part with one another just like the rotation of the wheel!

The Cri De Coeur Of Life....Or Not! - Part 3

Before you embark further, kindly go through this blog to have the accurate understanding of what is love, infatuation, and lust. 

You might think that you know their semantic differences in their usage.

But, how far have you implemented them in real life?

It has a set of hard-hitting 20 questions to keep yourself in balance from not abusing the person and yourself by making a jumbled mess of these three terms.

I was about to ask 5 or 6 questions like material possessions, accepting other person's idiosyncrasies, being real, emotional fulfillment etc. 

But, this write-up covered more questions than I had at the moment.

Of course.

Savage truth to yourself for every question is the mandatory pre-requisite.  

It goes without saying.

Why so many discrete blog parts where I had to elaborately speak about experience, Maslow's hierarchy, love, infatuation, and lust now?

The answer is pretty simple and straight-forward. 

None of them is discrete and dangles like a broken arm but Part 1 and Part 2 of this series has a sound logical connection with this blog on an emotional, physical, spiritual, psychological, mental,  and relational level.

It started with an innocuous status on Facebook.

Yep. Facebook again. 

And, you guessed it right.

It snowballed into a verbal volleyball where my friend and I had our own opinions and definitions of what Love is. 

True Love is when you are contented and satisfied with each other without any flamboyance of societal constructs of candlelight dinners or expensive gifts or the desire and want to impress one another.

This is the verbatim FB post and the conversation began as below:   

S - my Friend and V - Myself

S:That's right. But what is love if you cannot express it. And how to express love if not by doing simple things that impresses your consort.

V: Machi.....You have given me enough ammo to vivisection ur argument from various front...First up..I am sure u have heard about Classical Conditioning and Operant Conditioning...ELIFYing it further for those who are not in the know, it's the world-famous Pavlov's Dog experiment and Reinforcement Theory used in the corporates.....Keep this in mind as both the conditionings are crucial to our open discussion....Second....Define "Simple"...differs from individual to individual and for the same person, it may also differ from one instance to another. Third "impress ur consort"....If a person already truly loves their consort, what is the need to impress him/her....

Combining all three things above, I will just give an example....Let's take 2 imaginary people A & B...A presents B with a sporty BMW car on B's bday to impress them...Now, B will have the expectation that the next bday's gift will be something grander...Conditioning has already set in...If that conditioning isn't there and B is like "A's love is enough for me even if I don't get a gift", then no issues...Sadly, most ppl aren't like that...Expectations hurt...Big time...So, on the next B's bday, if A doesn't give a gift that matches and fulfills the expectations of B, then B becomes sad and unhappy though they might show it or they may not show it... 

Where is love here? B does not love A but only the physical object of the material that A has to offer B...Okay..leave this example...U might dismiss my example as only hypothetical and arbitrary and not a real-world scenario...On the contrary, What I have said is a typical real-world scenario by only taking 2 imaginary people...But, I will speak ur language as well.....What will happen if a husband forgets their wife's bday? 

Tell me with ur heart crossed...will it be heaven for the next one year for the husband? Now, u can possibly say that it is the husband's duty to remember their wife's bday...Now, the important distinction comes whether u r remembering ur wife's bday as mechanical like a chore and doing it for the sake of doing it or u r remembering ur wife's bday and giving her a gift coz u love her...

It is applicable from the wife's perspective as well...If the wife loves her husband and knows that he loves her as well, then it doesn't matter whether the husband remembers her bday or not...But, if the wife constantly complains that husband isn't giving her enough attention as in their earlier days, then the object of focus is only upon the fulfillment of their checklist instead of having love as their primary focus....It is as well equally pertinent to men too...Before the marriage and just to woo their consort....They gather all information about them and use it as a well-laid trap to entice their consort like an animal to a prey....If u really love a person, u don't have to lay traps....The moment when u do it, it's just to satisfy ur carnal pleasures....

How does it matter? It matters a fucking big time...

When u set traps to entrap a person into marriage, it's more of a personal game than being in the lasting feeling of love with the other person...After marriage, the two ppl will end up in quarrels, fights and ultimately in divorce...that's y some (read: most) of the love marriages end up as failures because the two ppl were playing games with each other catering to their self-interests and not for the other person...

By saying this, I am not stating directly or indirectly that arranged marriages are hunky-dory....It can also experience the Classical Conditioning and Operant Conditioning as well...and both the husband and wife discharge their duties towards eachother....

Duty without love and devotion is nothing but memorizing a rhyme and vomiting in school though discharging ur duty is relatively better than not discharging a duty at all....IMHO, enacting ur duty with love and devotion is the highest and supreme......

By saying all these things, I am not against the acts of exhibiting love as candle-light dinners or expensive gifts as long as the lasting feeling of love supersedes them....Some might think "hey, u r contradicting urself"....pls read the status and the comment thread again...My status doesn't say anywhere that I am against the flamboyance creation of societal constructs and my comments here also doesn't say it here either....

S: Let me reply you on your rather long post. Presenting something to your love is simply out of the affection you have for them and if they love you truly then they will understand your love and not place an expectation on the materialistic value. In your example above if A does not gift B the next year and if both are in love really then B will not expect. Similarly when A gifted a BMW B would only look at it as a material using which A has expressed his/her emotion. If the love is true then there is no question of expectation. So you may ask me why exhibit the love using materialistic things? Sadly, my friend, there is no other way to express and after all, you only live once.

And if you love your wife truly then you won't find it difficult to remember her birthday.

V: How can u be so sure that u only live once?

And, with this cliffhanger of a question, Part 4 will be the concluding cog to make this wheel of a series as a whole.

                                                                 X---To Be Concluded---X

The Cri De Coeur Of Life....Or Not! - Part 2

Maslow's Hierarchy puts succinctly that irrespective of caste, creed, nationality, race, religion or wealth, every one of us has the innate need and desire to love and be loved.

It is unavoidable and inescapable for any human being to not to be part of his pyramid.

To the uninitiated,

FYI the pyramid

It's asseverated that love and belonging are inextricable from our lives - be it man-woman or woman-woman or man-man or any other new combo that can spring up in the future.

Now, the important question is:

How should this love be?

It can be either conditional or unconditional.

I am not against conditional love as long as the perduring and long-lasting feeling of love is not extinguished when one's conditions are not met and unfulfilled.

To elaborate it neatly,

Let's say A (girl) and B (boy) are in love with each other.

A has a stipulated set list of criteria and factors that have to be satisfied like possessing money, car, house, intelligence, humor, non-smoking, non-drinking, well-groomed etc. and only then she will be in love.

It is equally applicable from the boy's perspective as well like beauty, character, disciplined, affluent, world-savvy etc. 

B meets all her said expectations - either genuinely or strategically. 

Likewise, A also meets B's standards - either genuinely or strategically.

If it's only strategic with the intent to possess the other person, then it's pure lust and things are damned for sure when both eventually agree upon a committed relationship.

But, if it is strategic even though there is love for the other person, it indicates a sense of insecurity and significant fear that you will lose them for 'n' number of reasons like competition or the other person finds another SO etc. And, even by the strategy cum love for one another they unite, then their love is tested to the core as insecurity raises its nasty head like a King Cobra to strike at the most expected and unexpected moments. Such a love can withstand the terrible onslaught of consequences if and only if they share mutual reciprocation towards each other despite all the fears and insecurities.

The supreme love that is pure and true which will reign for eternity is when a person gives carte blanche freedom to the other and respects them truly for what they are as an individual without any strings attached or strategy involved. In this scenario, there is a good possibility that they may join or may not join with each other but the realness of the relationship without any iota of fakery or dissimulation is revealed.

There is one more scenario wherein the love is pure and true uninhibited by any fear of loss or insecurity yet incorporate a strategy or tactic to be with the other person. Here, the other person has a tremendous chance to perceive that the love is adulterated and can probably hate them for tricking into a relationship even though it's free from impurities. Of course, with the right logic and persuasion,  the situation can be restored to normalcy and they regain the lost trust as it is not based on any ulterior motive but the strategy or tactic was executed only for the relationship to prosper and flourish

In our example of A & B,.

What will happen if either A or B fail to match one or more than one of their requirements after they get married or when they are in a relationship?

Needless to say, there will be a loud hue and cry as they have built their entire life on those conditions and their dreams are falling apart like the 'Inception' fortress. 

Unless, they have the maturity, compromising personality and the right attitude to give importance to their love than their individual selves, they become angry, sad and unhappy.

With time, it distastefully turns ugly into resentment and disappointment that they had entered into such a regretful relationship in the first place.

Is this love?

Yes. It's still love.

 But, it is based and dependent only on the self. 

The love is not for the other person and doesn't take them into consideration.

Basically, what has happened is that both the people (A & B) have not only fooled the other person but also themselves in the name of love by falsely thinking that they are in love with one another when the actual reality is that they love themselves more.

There is nothing wrong with self-love.

But, to what extent especially when you are married and have children?

Just to protect the vanity and pride of your egos of your Amour-propre, should those innocent beings be subjected to hell through your divorce?

That is the major and critical question that needs to be answered.

And, I will answer it too.

When you are in a relationship or marriage before having children, if your excessive self-love hurts/harms/damages the well-being of another person, it's either time to snap the ties or take corrective actions to have a long-lasting bond with them.

Of course, the corrective actions should be mutual so that both of them are in sync with each other.

It cannot be just a one-way traffic if it's a healthy and rosette companionship that both desire with each other.

And, in a country like ours where a person uses a wily and cunning strategy to acquire (Nope! the word 'acquire' is not haphazardly used!) the other person thinking that everything can be set right after marriage, such people have just dug not only their own graves but also the other person by just that mere thought. 

Things get holy messier now when only one changes and works to sustain the relationship but the other does not even give an inkling of thought for the another.

How much compromise can one forego to make it work?

Well. You should have the bravery and confidence to be idealistically enough to forgive them each and every time for committing the same or similar or different mistake day by day but you should not be foolishly practical enough to let them take undue advantage of you every time so that they could get away with their mistakes that's not hurting or harming them but you. 

As everyone is an imperfect human being and not a perfect God, give them 3 to 4 chances to correct their errors.

Why have I said specifically mentioned 3 to 4 chances?

The first time a mistake is being made, they may or may not know that what they are doing is a mistake. So, you tell them patiently and gently that it's not the right way to act or do things.

It's difficult to internalize everything in one go - depends on the rate of learning capability of the individual, their sincerity towards maintaining the relationship and their honesty with themselves to accept that they are wrong in the first place.

A quick learner will understand it fast and refrain from doing it but a slow learner may take time to grasp all the details in one go.

So, there is the possibility that they might have learned half of it and yet involve themselves in doing the same mistake again as their complete learning is not thorough.

Maximum 4 opportunities could be given to self-rectify their ways.

Beyond that, punishments must be awarded in some way so that the other person is out of harms' way from the repeated same mistakes.

When the person continuously does the same or different or similar mistake without any sense of remorse or guilt or self-correction or understanding that they are harming the other person to the extent that they are making their lives utterly miserable, it's time to call it a day and break away from them or allow them to do what they please as no punishment or deliberate cruel words would reform such incorrigible characters.

IMHO, unconditional love - a love freed from the shackles and manacles of expectations, clinging reasons, and conditions - is the best, highest and purest form as such a love accepts the other person for what they are as an individual, caring and showering affection on them even during the bad or worst days of their lives.

                                                              X---To Be Concluded---X

PS:
If you found Part 2 absorbing and compelling, then you will love Part 3 even more. 

The Cri De Coeur Of Life....Or Not! - Part 1

"By three methods we may learn wisdom - First, by reflection, which is noblest; second by imitation which is the easiest and the third by experience which is the bitterest"

- Confucious 

Whatever that we learnt in school and universities - be it science, history, geography, arts, engineering etc. are nothing but accumulated experiences of several people who had painstakingly put in their conscientious and diligent efforts to discover, duplicate, replicate, invent, innovate, observe, record and document etc. extensively for a long period of time that involved exhaustive laborious hours of patience, tolerance, suffering, endurance or even death for us to receive and gain that knowledge from our teachers and professors.

Logically extending it further, even our teachers and professors (not all!) had to face that strictest rigor by putting in their cognitive effort to simplify complex concepts for us. 

So, that's two levels of experiences that's involved with us when we are either active or passive participants in the respective institutions of schools and universities. 

Only two levels? Nayyyyy.

The moment we are attentive or having pipe-dreams during the class hours, this is another level of experience that's taking place for us either at a conscious or subconscious or unconscious level.

Thus, at every moment of our life, there are at least 3 levels of experience to which a person is subjected whether they have their involvement in it or not that could be due to their liking and disliking for it.

Why I said "at least" 3 levels is because there could be more which can possibly be happening all around us to us at our visible and invisible levels. 

And yes. It's perfectly applicable to those who haven't been to schools too.

How?

They personally experience events or situations and learn from it (not all again!). They hear/see the knowledge being given by others to some other people and imbibe it (not all again!). They learn from the experiences of others (not all again!).

Not experiencing is yet another kind of experience that's equally germane to those who undergoes formal or informal education but one thing is certain that the willingness to learn should be present at all moments to stay sharp and take the right decisions in easy or tough times. 

Whatever be the number of dimensions of experiences that could potentially exist, the knowledge which we have received or shared between/amongst us is only theoretical as we haven't actually experienced them other than the act of being in the process when the transference occurred between the teacher and student.

It's only when we begin to implement them that our own personal experience is kickstarted, initiated, grows and develops within our chosen field of blood, sweat, and tears.

Knowing anything is inherently an experience. But, understanding the knowing is better. The best is the experiencing of the understanding of the knowing.  

However, you should have the wisdom what could be experienced or not so that you don't put others' lives in jeopardy for your need or want to experience something or anything.

And to have the wisdom, mastery of wisdom comes at a later time!, you should clear-cut have the sound knowledge between right and wrong and implement them day in and day out even if it goes against one's personal interests, likings, and preferences. 

"Experience is the teacher  of all things"

- Julius Caesar

It's like a sports critic in a newspaper or TV excoriating a person for their blunder on the field when they do not have a single prior practicing or training or playing under the sweltering sun or freezing snow but cutely hides behind the wrong justification stating "That's your job. Do it properly. This is my job. I am doing it properly".

The so-called critics have no sense of hardship or ordeals what a sportsperson would mentally, physically, emotionally and psychologically undergo on the field - the pressure, stress, tension, and expectation from and live up to their parents, their spouses, themselves and most importantly, the nation for which they represent to win that shiny cup/medal.

Even if a critic has the right talent of imagination to see from their perspective, it's still not a substitute for the direct experience where a person undergoes severe and harsh difficulties during their workouts in the gym and playouts on the ground.

To give yet another twist from a different angle, case studies are a part and parcel of MBA-ians life. You will encounter plentiful that's to be analyzed and presented to the class or your faculty or both. When you do it as a mere mark-scoring exercise, get the degree and a plump job, the value of the case studies cease to exist.

The true meaning of case studies is when you grasp the understanding that they are real-world scenarios for which we give a solution though it will not be implemented by the corporate who faced the problem. Unless and otherwise, it's a competition. 

Now, protracting the logical essence further, when such a similar-to-same world scenario happens to us - either personally or professionally - we would be in a better position to tackle them than those who had taken it as a chore to complete.

Also, it is possible to think through innovative solutions when you wisely use and harness the power of your mind to extrapolate the situations and the scenarios.

There are those who will say that a case study is only theoretical and not practical.

But, when you go one step ahead, the case study came into being only because there was an actual issue faced by the organization.

Hence, a case study is an accumulation of experience just like the subjects that we had in our schools.

Now, a trickier thing happens. 

Whether you have the courage, guts, confidence, and fearlessness to experience the same bad event to you.

If the answer is Yes, then you have mastered the art of experiencing without experiencing. 

If the answer is No, then it indicates that there is still tremendous room for improvement to increase your courage and confidence levels to the right degree.

There is yet another filtration here.

The answer 'yes' which you had given - Is it brutally honest covering all conceivable scenarios for the situation along with the emotional aspects associated with it or a 'yes' that simply caters to placate and boost your ego.

If it is the latter, then it's worse than saying a 'No' as you are fooling yourself that you can do something when in actual reality you are inept and incompetent to do it.

If it is the former, then Voila! you have the necessary gumption and conviction to know what it takes to perform a thing without actually experiencing it.

But the best thing will be to just immerse yourself in the happening of things and learn as much as you can from the episode like hard-pressing a lemon in a squeezer without labeling them as 'good experience' or 'bad experience'.

Why I am saying not to label them is that not many people can handle disappointments or rejections in an even manner but they tend to substantially dwell in on the negative side of things for a considerably longer time period that might create and result in medical conditions and health issues or worst-of-the-worst case scenario - death.

In the end, the experience is a free-flow of energy that pervades your entire body like the excitement, chills, and thrills you have when you are on a twisty roller-coaster. 

A person who has never been on a roller-coaster for any number of reasons like fear of heights or fear of machinery failing etc. can expatiate at great length on how good or fantastic the ride is but it is when they are made to really sit on one, they would have the exact feel of the enjoyment.

Until then, it's either bookish or vicarious or simply heard & seen.

"Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved".

- Helen Keller

                     

                                                                 X---To be continued---X

PS 1:
I am well aware that whatever Einstein or Newton or Madam Curie or Edison or Tesla or Galileo underwent were singular experiences that are unique to each and every one of them. But, they worked for science and thus, I collectively summed up all their experiences as one experience under the umbrella of Science as a subject taught in schools and colleges.

The same holds good for geographers where different navigators set sail across wild and raging oceans thus losing their lives or coming up trumps in their quest to discover new lands, flora, fauna, and riches.

The line of reasoning remains intact for other fields as well.

PS 2:
Part 2 will make you think hard & feel deep

Jalpaan - A Cornucopia of a Scrummy Buffet!

How do you feel when you walk into a dress boutique and you find the exact design with the same shade of color which is at the right price decimal that you had in mind? 

You will be bouncing all over the wall and pinching yourself just to make sure that you are not in an Inception-like dream. Right?

That's the precise kinda fulfilling and satisfying experience that you have once when you sail close to the wind of maximum bitings into the displayed delicious smorgasbord of 50 delectables on the tables.

If you are the sort who loves to have a go at all the well-arranged and nicely prepared array of dishes, you can straight-away skip to the next para. In case, your curiosity got the better of your wise intellect, you will be reading this including the full stop. Most buffets stuff you with the entrees and other hors d'oeuvre so that you have little breathing space in your stomach for exploring the rest of their tasty victuals which are smiling, waving and inviting you from their perspective. Like how you duck down or move sideways in Paintball, when you are smart enough to dodge the tantalizing and alluring entrees by munching your teeth into the 'wanna-have wanna-have' courteous service of the appetizers to your apt level that is appropriate, then you could dine around the entire spread by being the winner that the restaurant hadn't seen it coming.

So, those who have skipped the rest of the previous para and have arrived here like a super Super Mario's shortcut to various stages, Jalpaan served 4-5 starters like the usual suspects - Paneer, Potato, Gobi, Corn in addition to the soup that was brought in earlier. It was a decent quick bite into the bite-sized snacks.

Instead of having an elaborate and large salad bowls, they could have had a Live Salad Counter where you are pressed with the best of the lot rather than being engulfed in an embarrassment of riches of fresh and creamy varieties of healthy veggies. Next, there was the chat section where 2 to 3 I-forgot-the-name items, Pani Puri, Dahi-Something, Gujarati specials as Dhokla, Mirchi Bajji, and Cheese Toast (CT) were neatly stacked. Other than the CT which was cold and tasted like a frozen Cheesy Garlic Bread, the Chat was a successful intimate tete-a-tete between the dishes and the tongue. FYI - I couldn't dig into Pani Puri and Dahi-Something as there were aplenty in the Dessert and didn't want to overload the already loading tummy.

It was time for Naan & Roti with spicy, lip-smacking and fried potato with Paneer Butter Masala and Daal. The potato was smashing, pun intended. Moving onto the Veg-Biriyani, Veg Pulao and Noodles was satisfactory. But, the highlight is the hot Rasam with plain rice and the curd rice with multi-colored and multi-shaped fryums. When you have the dash of ingenuity and use the potato as a side-dish, heavens was in your mouth.

When you are already reeling under the heavy influence of awesome bits, bytes and chewed dishes and you know that you still have an Everest to climb in the separated Dessert segment, it was only half the battle won, okay three-quarters to be on the dot.

Dessert was no desert for the yummy chills and smooths of the several flavorful varieties. Fruit Salad with any one of Chocolate, Strawberry or Vanilla. XYZ-gourd named-Green hot Halwa with one of the remaining two ice-creams and Gulab Jamun with the only other remaining dollop. You have got to instantly plan it out if you wish to combine every ice-cream and the sweets on the counter. And then, you had the mousses, Bengali sweet and Kheer.

If your eye-popping and perplexed mind wonders how a single person would be able to eat almost the every one of them, it's simple. The trick is  to essentially and accurately measure your body's requirements, its full capacity, and your innate self-restraint to not to wolfishly gorge onto any exceptionally palatable or your preferred choice of food like Paneer or Corn in the starters' department or chats or potato etc. to an excessive degree but to strictly limit and apportion the spread in such a way that you don't puke yourself yet have spoonfuls of the fantastically energy-expended dishes by the top chefs and still, you entertain your senses with the eclectic array of cuisines.

The key is discipline. 

Without discipline, even our solar system wouldn't be in such a highly ordered manner as it is now like the planets revolving in a periodic elliptical orbit that apparently gives rise to day, night, year and most importantly - Real Life. 

Discipline.

Combine discipline with the regular respite to take a good breather and gauge how much your body can hold further and what's still remaining - Voila! The restaurant would still be tearing their heads' apart for the superhuman feat on the feast.

And, the entire spectrum of the lavish buffet comes at a reasonably priced @ Rs. 549.

Office lunches and Family get-togethers can have a steal here with the wide assortment of delicacies that are presented before you.

Last but not the least, a special word of mention to the always-in-need staff and the maitre d' who actually recommended me to have the best worth of my money spent @ Jalpaan.

Was it worth it?

A loudly burrrrrpppppp-ing Yes. 

Don't be disgusted and make that face like a bulldog chewing a wasp.

It's a natural consequence when you are totally satisfied.

  

Oru Nalla Naal Paathu Solren - Saying The Verdict Today Itself!

When you are visiting a concept or an idea or a software after a long while, it's always better to have a peek at the FAQs or brush up on the basics so that even the latest update is covered in it.

I shall elucidate it further to uncomplicate what I have said above.

For instance. Say - You are logging into Facebook after a lengthy hiatus due to any number of reasons. 

Instead of being like a deer caught in the headlights and completely at sea (when you are on land - Bad Joke!), it would be highly wise and extremely sensible just to click on their FAQ section to have a quick scan as to what are all the recent changes that have been made since your I-don't-know-when last and current visit. 

This will not only save ample time (as you will be wasting it by fiddling with the various features without knowing or being aware how many you have explored/not yet discovered) but also makes you exactly understand how the product's capabilities could be effectively utilized so that you can improvise besides the given benefits as intended by the provider..

How does my above reference fit in with the movie at hand?

Well.

Had the director showed a little bit of commitment and did his free-flowing investment into watching and re-visiting movies like Ullathai Allitha or Avvai Shanmughi or Kalakalapu, he would have known that it's immensely possible to make a great comedy even if it is devoid of a core story or socially-inclined message through humor. 

More importantly, he would have understood that the humor element must be spread throughout the film like evenly distributing the jam on bread than being in patches like bumpy potholes on a highway road.

No doubt that Oru Nalla Naal Paathu Solren (ONNPS) has terrific smiles, waves of laughters, big guffaws, and clap-worthy scenes. 

But, the major snag with the movie is the drag, especially in the second half. More than most of the scenes were silly and ridiculous to such an extent that I was feeling really sorry for the much-talented and versatile Vijay Sethupathi (VS) to have accepted the role even though he has done more than enough justice to it.

Yes. It was a completely new and different avatar that we haven't seen him before. And, once again. He has managed to pull it off with aplomb and his own inimitable style - like his poker-faced and deadpan wry one-liners, his awesome body language when he walks as the Head of the Tribe or his various shades of expressions throughout the course of the film. 

Simply fantabulous.

But, with the continuous high-pitched screams from the other sidekicks that were going into my head (Not sure about the rest of the audience!) like a drill into a wall and the protracted what-the-hell-is-happening-here-screenplay was like a macaronic traffic congestion when the lights don't work. 

If the shrieks, yells and the intensity of the loudness had been dialed back, it would have been a decent outing despite the Dinosaurized Modernized storyline (with clusters of slapstick and situational humor) and horrible songs.

Speaking of the music, it would have been better if there were no songs in the first place. Barring one melodious song in the first half,  even Yama Dharmaraja would have driven away with his buffalo if at all he has the chance to hear them. God-awful.

The fresh heroine face (for Kollywood!) was cute in some places, pretty at certain places, vivacious at still others and criminally innocent as demanded by the script. 

You should also give it to Gautam Karthik as the happy-go-lucky chap and also for playing second fiddle to VS. After being a hero in many a movie, you should have real guts to get beatings and bashings in the climax from the goons. 

However, his hyper-effervescent nature gets into your skin and pushes you to the limits of maddening infuriation at few places. All you can do is give a deep suspiration in those instances. Whether that was exactly how the director expected and desired from him or not, he will only know. 

The director has tried something new particularly with the Planetary-esque introduction about the multi-verse, then slowly receding to other galaxies, our own Milky Way, Solar System and then finally pinpointing to the remote village in Andhra. 

It was fantastic to have such a thought process instead of merely stating "A remote village in Andhra Pradesh". Needless to say, the opening had the hallmark for the movie to be something radical. Free or not - I don't know. Terrible Scientific Pun!

While we are the topic of Andhra Pradesh, I was really puzzled as to why there were no subtitles for the conversations when they were in Telugu - Second half had a preponderance of such dialogues.

For those who understood the language, it was a non-issue.

But, for those who don't know it like me (Could be many in the audience!), it was like watching the sound waves being compressed into crests and troughs and coming out of their mouths in an unintelligible form. 

To make it clearer, it was like watching a Korean movie without subtitles.

All said and done, ONNPS had the good intent to be a nice comedy frolic with the rich talent as VS in the lead role. Sadly, that wasn't to be the case.

Doesn't it make you laugh?

Yes. It does. In a fantastic way.

At the same time, there were many moments where it was cacophonous and exasperates you to the tipping point of when-will-this-absurdity-get-over.

Since it is the director's first exploits, I am sure he will come back strongly. 

If he learns from his mistakes.

Verdict:
If you can just bear and endure the harshly ear-piercing loudness and annoying 'kaatu mokka' scenes, then you will definitely enjoy this movie. 

Wrapping it up by saying that the director deserves a good pat on the back for coming up with a novel idea that sets it apart from other commercial films - the kind of experimental movie like Kollywood's first spoof 'Tamil Padam'.

My only disappointment was that it could have been way better than what was shown.

PS:

I did not understand one simple thing.

Why should Gautam and his friend travel all the way to Pondicherry when they could have given a call to the heroine's mom to convey about the kidnapping (okay - Adultnapping! - Pathetic Joke!) by getting the number from her friend by being in Chennai itself rather than making a tedious journey to Pondi and then to the village? 

Anyone (whoever has seen this flick!) who understood it, please do leave your reply in the comment below.

But, the most probable answer which the director could give is that they wouldn't have wanted to freak out her mom or that her mom might think that someone is playing a prank on her.